St. Craptrick's Day

Oh man! I am soooo witty with my titles. "St. Craptrick's Day." What a riot!

The really funny thing about St. Patrick's day is not my witty puns, but that America really has no reason to be celebrating it. We Americans, as a whole, are not anywhere close to being Irish and our history, excluding all the initial hatred toward Irish immigrants, really has nothing to do with America at all. As a country, we only celebrate it so that we have an excuse to get drunk and box each other. We don't even box each other.

I would even venture as far to say that America really has no culture of its own. We are just big mooches. We call ourselves the giant mixing pot so that we can just grab any holiday that we like and make it our own.

Think about it. What holidays are exclusively American? We have President's day. Wooowee! We have Memorial day. And we have labor day, Thanksgiving and Columbus day. Have you ever had fun actually celebrating one of these holidays before? I haven't. Sure, we have lots of fun enjoying these days off, but our holidays just tend to suck. The best that we can do to celebrate a holiday that only we celebrate exclusively is dragging giant balloons down a street for Thanksgiving. And what does that have to do with giving thanks anyways? America is corrupt I tell you!

America is not festive. We are a nation obsessed with olden dead folk.

- Steve