Steve Geluso, Great Citizen

Today in Moses Lake, at the JV track meet where only the best athletes go, their was a horrible accident. As the girls 800 meter run started a row of sprinklers along the back straightaway of the track turned on and spewed water onto the track. The wind and sprinklers quickly discouraged most of the girls in the race so I, being the intuitive great citizen that I am, went over to a corner where the girls were getting hit by the water and stood on the sprinkler to keep it down. Some of the girls racing took time out of their stride to turn their heads to me and mutter out a small "thank you" and, well, those girls lost.

The race ended and I went on to doing other stuff. When the 200 meter race started there were a few people trying to keep the water off the athletes by just holding the sprinklers in another direction but they had nooooo easy solution to keep the sprinklers like that for the rest of the meet. That's when I knew that I had to step in and be a great citizen again by putting my unsurpassable intellect to use for the common good.

Taking careful note of my surrounds and how I could use them, I ran over to a trash can, ripped off the lid off, and sprinted over to the nearest "sprinkler control guard." I made direct eye contact with the goon and pointed slowly from the garbage can cover to the sprinkler. He looked back at me with a quizzical look on his face but let me approach his position slowly. I was gently setting the lid on top of the sprinkler when a ray of sun glanced off the shiny surface into the eyes of the goon sending him scampering away. The lid blocked the sprinkler perfectly and I fixed up two other sprinklers the say way to take the work out of other people's hands. Eventually other people caught on to what I was doing and grabbed trash can lids from all over the grounds to cover up the unwanted sprinklers. I had started a revolution and saved the day.

Seeing that my initial job of having the idea, putting it to use, and leading other people to do the same, was done, I walked around gloating about my efforts. I bragged to every semi-not-man-looking girl, "those sprinklers? yeah, they were pretty bad. they could have ruined the whole meet, you know? wellll.. as a matter of fact, I was the one who came up with the idea to put the trash can lids on top of them. pretty amazing, eh?" To which they would respond with furtive glances at me among their friends. Those glances didn't bother me much because I knew that they were all just checking me out.

After a few rounds of spreading the good news about my work I noticed that there were still two sprinklers that didn't have garbage can lids on top of them. Worse yet, there were not any more lids around to cover them! It was a crisis! Everyone in the entire stadium set their gaze upon me as I pulled out my sewing scissors and reached into the nearest lidless garbage can. I found two Gatorade bottles and cut their tops off so that the rest of the bottle could fit around the sprinklers. Then, I strode over to the last two sprinklers and capped them real good with the sprinkler-plug turned Gatorade bottles. Yet again, the design was perfect and not a single drop from the sprinklers was shed on to the track.

The funny thing was that no one recognized my valiant efforts and work done to save the track meet at all today. People were probably just told not to thank me today because that would demean the proper thanking that I have earned. The Moses Lake faculty is probably writing up a fancy official "thank you" right now with my name on it. I probably wont get the "thank you" letter until after they have finished casting the mold for the new statue in the track depicting my ingenuity, leadership and heroics shown today. And, of course, that statue wont be put up until after I have enough free time to set aside to attend the freakin' long ceremony and baby-kissing that will be needed to honor setting it up.

And from now on you can call me "Cann." Not only is it just a really cool sounding nickname but it also reminds me of who I am and what I have. I have a "Cann do attitude!" And that will be my catch phrase. Either that or "Only you, Cann, prevent forest fires!"

- Steve